I’m a big talker.
That’s right. I talk real big. I say things like, “God has called me to do this thing!” and, “If it’s God’s will, I know it will happen!” and even, “This is totally the year my dream is coming true!”
The problem with talking big is that, well, sometimes people listen. And occasionally those people love you enough to hold you accountable. Which means that every once in a while, you might just find yourself snapping, “Don’t ask me about that! I don’t know! I still have time! Just Leave Me Alone!” to the sweetest friend who had the nerve to ask how that project, that goal, that dream is going.
Almost exactly a year ago, I grabbed the seat at the end of a crowded table across from my friend. Over the laughter and shouts of our friends catching up and carrying on beside us, I whispered, “I think I’m supposed to write a book.”
And then I burst into tears.
I’d like to tell you now that I’m joking or exaggerating or, you know, talking big. But in that moment, the very first time I’d said those terrifying, heart-deep words to anyone, I was a mess.