I mean, really. Why’s it have to ask me like that, every time? Do I WANT to exit? NO! Of course not! But I am, technically, a grown-up who needs to go to bed at some point. So quit asking me that, okay? Geez, Netflix. Quit being so clingy!
Until a few months ago we rarely used our Netflix account. We don’t have a gaming system or a Roku box thing or whatever it is that people use to get the Netflix on their televisions. [If you’re new here, you should probably get a handle on my slow adoption of new technology situation and read about the day I said goodbye to my VCR. Here’s a hint: It was not that long ago.]
But recently our lives were changed when we switched cable providers and, suddenly, Netflix appeared on our TV. Like magic! OH, THE SHOWS WE CAN WATCH! You know, without getting out that bulky cord and connecting the computer to the TV, like we did before.
It’s been awesome. I have watched A LOT OF THINGS. Not all of them great, fine, yes, this I will admit. But still, I finally watched (and loved. LOVED.) Sherlock, and I’m currently rewatching Chuck — so all is right with the world and my viewing experience.
Except…
Netflix is kind of ruining my life.
I mean, I used to have no problem watching one episode of my favorite shows each week. Unexpected reruns or holidays annoyingly coinciding with my regularly scheduled programming was irritating, sure. But for the most part I was content to watch my shows whenever the powers that be decided to give them to me.
Now, though. Oh, now, I can watch as many episodes IN ONE SITTING as I want. And I. Do. Want! So there’s been a lot of sitting at my house. Even more than usual.
And you know what happens when you watch episode after episode of a show? You get completely sucked into its world sometimes. And if that fictional world you’re watching happens to be a dark one (Hello, stupid Heroes, I’m talking to you!)? Well, good luck, my friends. Maybe go ahead and schedule that therapist appointment for the approximate week you anticipate resurfacing because you are probably going to need it. Holding onto reality is hard – and re-entry can be even worse.
Then – THEN! – there’s what happens when you try to go back. Re-watching old shows and discovering new ones is all well and good, but there ARE still shows on live TV. Right? You remember this? Shows playing today, at this very moment, that you might want to watch before they make it to Netflix? But how?
Sure, sure, you’ll DVR them. But can you really handle watching just one episode at a time? LIKE AN ANIMAL? But what else can you do? Save them up until you have enough for a good, solid binge? But what if you accidentally read or hear a spoiler? How annoying will that be?! WHAT TO DO?!
And speaking of spoilers and talking to other people about TV shows because it’s what we do…the emotional anguish that comes with binge-watching a show on Netflix that EV-ER-Y-ONE else in the WORLD has already watched and then NOT HAVING ANYONE TO TALK TO ABOUT IT? Well, it’s nearly unbearable. Do you know that I went back and read old recaps and reviews of Friday Night Lights when Mark and I watched last year? I may have (DEFINITELY DID) even listened to a couple (MORE THAN THAT) podcasts about it, just so I could pretend like anyone I know cares about a nine-year-old show.
So, you see, Netflix is clearly wrecking my entire life. Everything I hold dear (mainly my sanity and productivity) is at risk. I feel like I could say so much more about this, but you guys, I just got to the fourth season of Chuck when he [SPOILER ALERT – wait, what’s the expiration date on this, ANOTHER PROBLEM Netflix causes!?] finds out his mom was a spy, too. So obviously I don’t have time for more blogging.
Do not feel bad. I still miss Friday Night Lights. Such an awesome show. Right now on Netflix, I am in the middle of the many episodes of West Wing. I am a West Wing junkie. Still far and away, for me, the best show EVER. We should have a club.
I’ve barely started West Wing. When I finish rewatching Chuck I’ll get back into it. Then maybe I’ll qualify for your club! :)
Oh, Mary, you are hilarious as always!! Yes, I too, get a kick out of the Netflix question box about “keep watching”…. It always makes me pause. No, three hours of solid watching is just fine guys – move along, thanks! LOL.
I have gotten so good at the binge watching that I hate it when I have to watch it one episode, one week at a time. Anarchy!
Keep on keeping on. But do feed and bathe the kids as necessary. =)
Best, Lina
Haha! Yes, meals and baths do seem to be necessary. Sadly. ;)
That’s how I felt when watching Breaking Bad during maternity leave and seemingly everyone had already watched it. I went back and watched YouTube videos of the actors accepting dozens of awards because BEST SHOW EVER.
You know you’re hooked when you have to seek supplementary viewing, right? :)
all. so. true.
My latest Netflix binge was season one of The Blacklist. We were so hooked that we actually paid for Hulu Plus so we could watch season 2 without the wait. I still haven’t recovered from finishing Friday Night Lights. I actually started watching it AGAIN a couple of weeks ago. {sigh}
I keep hearing how awesome The Blacklist is but still haven’t watched it. I should do it now before the new season starts, shouldn’t I???
You’re so adorable. I watched All of Kimmy Schmidt in … mmm … maybe a week? Maybe less? My husband and I also watched waaaay too many back-to-back episodes of the first season of House of Cards until I found myself making awkward commentary out loud … in public places … like Frank. So after that intervention, I gave up House of Cards for Parenthood, which means I now ugly cry at least three times a week.
I’ve been tempted to watch House of Cards, but I think it might be a bit much for me. Kimmy Schmidt, though, was right up my alley! And YES, I definitely watched it in a {very} short period of time!