photo © 2006 Brian Gurrola | more info (via: Wylio)
As my TV show came to a close and my throat got even more scratchy, I began feeling desperate. I’d had a great post planned for today, but despite having an interesting topic, I was coming up empty. I had no words. No inspiration. No mojo.
And so, as I became more anxious for a blog post – and bed, I pulled up a drafted idea I’d saved a few months ago.
It was only this morning that I remembered Lisa-Jo’s Five Minute Friday prompt. But I figure it’s never too late to write something real. So, here goes . . .
Five years ago I was in a weird place. An in-between place. A confusing place.
We’d left the church plant a couple months before and returned to our home church. Because our Sunday school class – the place we felt true community, real fellowship – had pretty much disintegrated after many of us left for the new church, we had to find a new group to hang with on Sunday mornings.
We jumped right in, shopping around for a Sunday school class that fit us. After three attempts, though, we’d basically exhausted all the options for young – or not-so-young – married couples, and we were frustrated. Disappointed.
On the work front, I had left my job at the ad agency for another agency in town. I worked in a beautiful old building on a street that smells like coffee and looks like Sesame Street. The position I’d taken had lots of opportunity, and my manager was a brilliant woman I knew would teach me a lot.
Unfortunately, I was miserable. My new job – the one that was supposed to save me from a place that had become frustrating and ugly – demanded crazy hours and a dedication I couldn’t muster, all for clients that sold mind-numbingly boring things like horse vaccines.
[I’d convinced myself that I could write about horse vaccines, because horses are nice. And healthy horses are even nicer. But the truth was I couldn’t do it. Just. Couldn’t. Do. It.]
As if those two situations weren’t enough, under the surface of normal, everyday, fine-thanks-for-asking, our finances and marriage were pretty rough.
Looking back, five years ago was not the best place I’ve ever been. So as I look at today and feel like it’s weird . . . and confusing . . . and definitely in-between, I am so thankful that today’s “place” is WAY better than five years ago’s!
Well, that was a bit longer than five minutes. But in my defense, I have a certain three-year-old itching to build a new house from her blocks. So, that’s a short, unedited look back into my life. And now I’m going to play with some MegaBlocks!
What did YOUR life look like five years ago?
Horse vaccines? I can’t imagine! :) It is definitely good to look back sometimes… both fondly and also so that you can see how far you’ve come. And what a wonderful thing to realize how very much better you’re enjoying your “today” place.
Thank you for sharing the not so good, and praise God you’ve moved forward to a better place.
Love that you played along Mary. I often think by Friday, five minutes of writing is about all I’ve got in me anyway.
And horse vaccines? Yea, that’d be tough. I’m trying to think up copy now as I type and it’s making me smile.
i tried the 5 minutes this week, too. it was a crazy experiment! and i love that even though you’re still in an uncertain place, it’s more certain than 5 years ago. what a great lesson…
Oh that’s a scary thought- 5 years ago I had a baby and another one on the way! Aiden would sit on the floor, him playing with toys and trying to figure out how to crawl, and I would sit with him trying desperatly not to throw up.
Now is a much better place too!
It can be so hard to look back sometimes, but amazing to see how far we’ve come. 5 years ago I was still working at a job I loved. I was married but the idea of kids had barely crossed my mind. Amazing how quickly things change.
Horse vaccines?? Really?? Wow…not many of us can say we’ve worked in that field! :)
Glad now is better than 5 years ago!!! Difficult times do eventually pass, don’t they? 5 years ago, I was a newlywed and thought I had my job situation sorted. Well, cutbacks/layoffs etc hit, and I’m still working, but I’m not even CLOSE to where I thought I’d be. I’m still happily married though, and know what? Life is good. I wonder where I’ll be 5 years from now?! If I’ve learned anything in the last 5 years, is that things are often out of your control and you just have to “roll with things”. Have a great weekend.
So thankful to be on the other side of 5 years as well…though I know HE was working through all the small, great moments, carving me into the person I am now.
Been there done that (on the church plant thingy). Enjoyed reading your thoughts. I’m here via The Gypsy Mama’s 5 Minute Friday. :)
5 years ago I was still working in customer service (horrors) but was about to find out I had a new job as a copy editor! I was on the brink of leaving for Thailand for two weeks. I lived in a great apartment with my sweetie that we’d soon leave to buy a house that now plagues me. That apartment is looking real good from this side of the fence, despite the noisy woman upstairs.
I love your real-ness here. So glad things are better today than 5 years ago. Hope you get to feeling better.
Thank you for being open and honest! And arent you thankful it IS better now and how God brought you to where you are now?!?!?! Joined you via Gypsy Mama!
Five years ago, I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. My 2 kids were in their teens and I was thinking about what I was going to do with my spare time. But God has an amazing sense of humor and blessed us with a midlife baby. So instead of going back to college to refresh my skills for the work place, I am building cities with megablocks. :)
5 years ago, this month, I was holding the first of my 3 precious girls. I had EVERY day, I had of maternity leave, marked on the calendar. And I used it all…ALL of it…and most of it w/out pay. February was the end of my time at home with Mallory…and then back to work at something I absolutely LOVED doing…but not nearly as much as I LOVED her. And with you of course we were muddling through the NP saga…and dropped off the face of the earth where spiritual things were concerned. And so started my journey into Parents As Teachers and then prego with #2 the same month Mallory turned 1.
Hmm, 5 years ago, I had a a 17 year old in community college, a 15 year old homeschooling, but not wanting to do his work, and a 12 year old still homeschooling. I was not working outside the home, but hubby was. He had taken a job basically traveling Mon-Fri every week. Was a tough year. We had just gotten involved at a new church, going from a home church to a church of 1000.
Wow, what a different place than now…
10 things to do tonight to have a better tomorrow