Edited to add: I actually wrote this post before getting ugly, itchy poison ivy all over my face (and other parts, ahem!). Clearly I needed a reminder that my appearance is not the most important thing in the world! I actually forgot that I had this post scheduled until this morning. I’m leaving it here, because I still think it’s funny that I’ve gotten so lax in my definition of appropriate going-out-in-public attire. Clearly, though, I’m rethinking just how important this is after all! Feel free to weigh in on THAT debate in the comments!
When I was in high school, I spent considerable time every morning curling my hair and carefully applying bright red lipstick. I’m not saying it was the most attractive look for me, but it’s what I did.
More recently, I’ve stocked my purse, my car and my office desk with powder, eyelash curler and lipstick. A girl can never be too prepared, right?
Simply put, I didn’t leave my house without a fresh coat of makeup. Just didn’t do it.
Flash forward to last weekend, however, and you’ll see a completely different picture. You’ll see me wearing stretched out yoga pants, plastic flip flops and absolutely no makeup. I did put on a bra (whew!), but combing my hair or putting in my contacts was apparently too much to ask.
That’s how I left my house to pick up a pizza. And run a couple other errands.
Who am I? And what happened to my lipstick-addicted self? I kind of miss that girl.
I was never a snazzy dresser, but I also wasn’t one of those girls wearing scrubs or pjs to class in college. And though I did wear my glasses to academic team meets during my senior year of high school (to look smarter, of course – it’s all about the intimidation when it comes to brain bowl), I hate how I look in glasses and rarely wear them in public. And yeah, there was the time when I was so stressed out and distracted the morning of a big fundraising event that I forgot to wash my hair, but typically, I’m a must-shower-and-wash-hair-every-single-day kind of gal.
Even when I first quit my job last year to stay home, I vowed to never become one of those stay-at-home-moms. I wasn’t about to start lounging and stop showering. I mean, EW! Right?
Except . . . well, when nobody expects you to dress up and, in many cases, dressing up doesn’t make sense (i.e. babies who spit up or toddlers who spill milk or preschoolers who can’t remember to put the lids back on the markers), it’s easy to start letting things slide.
Things have been sliding over here at my house. Just ask the Pizza Hut guy.
Now, I’m not a total slob. [yet.] I may only take about 9 minutes to shower and get ready in the morning, but I do shower. In general, I find basic hygiene (and contacts, because as I mentioned, I don’t have cute glasses or look cute in glasses) a must. But completely blow drying my hair has not been a priority for quite some time, and though I do put on real clothes before leaving the house each morning, makeup outside of moisturizer has fallen off the get-ready grid somewhere along the stay-at-home way.
Honestly, I never would have guessed that I’d let my daily beautifying routine go so far and so quickly. In general, I’m a pretty vain person. So to get to the point where I run errands in grungy (and I don’t mean in the formerly cool, Seattle grunge way) clothes and no makeup? I have reached an all-time low.
If you spend much of your day at home, do you find yourself doing less to your appearance? Or do you up a routine of showering, dressing and putting on makeup, no matter what your schedule?
OMG are you me. When I worked I was primped, painted, pedi’d and mani’d. Now – it’s bag lady all the way. And the last time I went for a 6 weekly trim…
I have never been good at keeping up with regular trims. These days, though, it’s simply embarrassing. I just got my hair cut this past week – but only because my daughter wanted to get hers cut, so I just got both of us done at once!
I was letting myself go, too. Makeup has always been an expression of femininity for me, and I was actually surprised when I realized that I was more and more often leaving home without it. I had stopped straightening my hair… Things like that that can add a special touch and that always made me feel good. I made a conscious, intentional choice to boost myself every day and look my best! I have two girls and I hope I can instill in them the notion that they are beautiful and worth the time they spend doing whatever gives them that boost and helps them present their best face to the world– whatever that is!
I can so relate to this : ) When I think about the time I got to spend on my appearance before kids it’s with a wistful sigh! I actually wore jewelry and perfume! : ) It actually feels like such a luxury when I get to spend more than 5 minutes on my appearance these days. Who needs a spa! Just give me 30 minutes alone in the bathroom! And last year when I had Christopher at the end of October? We joked about how I went into hibernation but looking back I LIVED in my fleece robe and slippers…
Hmmm…fleece…*happy sigh* :)
Hope you recover soon from your brush with poison ivy!
Thank you, Ledys!
I love my days at home for a break from the makeup/hair routine. I have to shower, but just throw my hair in a ponytail without washing & don’t do any makeup. And it feels GREAT!!
When I’m home with the boys during the summer, though, and the above is my daily routine, it starts to feel great to actually do my hair, put on makeup & clothes that aren’t stretched out–because it’s so unusual.
I’m like you, Mary–since I’ve had kids, I’ve noticed that it doesn’t bother me (as much) to run to the grocery store in crummy clothes with no makeup on. For one thing, it’s usually 9 pm and there aren’t as many people around. For another, I care less and less about what other people think. Even though I DO still care to a certain extent in that I’d like to at least look presentable. Sigh. It’s an endless circle!
You’re exactly right, Erin. Something about becoming a mom has made me much less concerned about what other people think. Not oblivious, certainly, but a lot more relaxed.
Forget “formerly” Seattle grunge is making a comeback, although I don’t know if that helps our case. I like to dress up and wear make up, but I am like you and it never fails that when I make a quick trip to the store in sloppy clothes and greasy hair, I WILL run into somebody I know.
One time, years ago, I ran into a guy I went to high school with at the grocery store. It totally took me by surprise – I hadn’t seen him since college, and there he was, at MY store! :) Ever since then, if I go to that store looking less than my best (which, I’ll admit is often. It’s the closest store, so the one that we run to for last-minute whatevers.), I speed walk through the place, glancing furtively around, in case he decided to visit “my” store again. Of course, I haven’t seen him since. But that run-in years ago (and my subsequent decline into yoga pants and ponytails) scarred me for life!
ok… HAHAHA! yes, i am [sometimes] one of ~those~ stay at home moms… and i don’t think it’s altogether that bad. like you said, what’s the point of getting all dolled up if your baby’s gonna puke on you, or if your husband’s not gonna get home until after you’ll have your jammies on again anyway?! there are actually days that ben calls on his way home from work and i go run into the bathroom and put on makeup and brush my hair. ;-)
i think the big difference though, is if you’re just sitting around lounging on the couch all day (sitting around lounging–what’s THAT?!) or if you’re actually busily doing stuff with your kids or around your house. the latter is totally okay in my book to skip snazzying yourself up!
a couple times i have gone out to the store with little to no makeup on. and i don’t think it’s that i was being lazy, but that i have become more confident with natural beauty and don’t have the pressure to look like all the other girls or be caked with makeup like i was in high school and college. seriously, a couple of my friends wear hardly any makeup and i don’t think “gosh, she’s ugly,” or “man she’s lazy,”… it’s more like “gosh, i wish i could pull off no makeup!”
so yea, i feel like i’m rambling here. what was the question?! ;-) i have vowed to myself, though, that i’ll never go to the store in jammie pants or slippers! THIS stay at home mom will NOT end up on peopleofwalmart.com! lol!
Lounging on the couch? Who me? :)
My hair is what I let go. I have crazy wavy hair and I will freely admit that I just don’t spend all that much time styling it just to go to the doctor’s or the grocery or what have you. If I’m going to be teaching at the homeschool co-op, I’ll pull out the flatiron, but otherwise, not so much. I figure there’s a reason they invented the giant claw clip.
Since I’m working with elderly relatives rather than small children, I do have to get dressed most days (but no more pantyhose – hooray!) and I’ll admit that even just around the house, I have to at least get out of the pjs or I don’t feel quite right. Again, since I spend a fair amount of time helping elderly relatives, they tend to have the traditional Southern lady’s expectation that I’m going to be dressed properly and “have my face on” when I go out. If I showed up at my great aunt’s house without lipstick, she’d wonder what dire emergency had befallen us! :)
Oh, Amy, your comment made me laugh! Heaven forbid a Southern lady go out of the house without lipstick! Haha! :)
At some point every day I take a shower and put on makeup and clothes. It might not be until right before I leave to get the kids from school, or right before my husband comes home from work, but I will do it. On the rare nights I don’t shower until late I will skip makeup and just put on pjs, but I usually don’t do that. I have worn yoga pants out, but they are fitted and clean and I wear a fitted shirt too. If I leave the house I try to put on makeup first. I just feel better about how I look when I do it. It takes less than five minutes. I think the only time I have worn pj pants out of the house was when I had just had a baby and went to the grocery store at 9pm with my dad just to get out of the house! I function better when I take the time to get myself together, but I completely understand how easy it is to let that stuff go when you are not leaving the house.