I used to fall asleep by imagining my next class reunion. I missed my five-year and it seemed logical to me that I would have achieved greatness – and a single-digit jeans size – by age 28. So I’d close my eyes and dream up a scenario straight out of the movies.

I’d walk in, catch everyone’s eye and start catching up with my classmates. I’d tell them – humbly, of course – about my awesome job and pretend not to notice them noticing how fantastic I looked. Yes, that’s right, I’d think. I did lose a little weight. Did I mention the 5K I ran last weekend? FOR CHARITY, OF COURSE.

I know. I was all sorts of crazy.

And, funny thing is, I was seven months pregnant at my 10-year reunion. Single-digit jeans? No way. I would’ve simply been happy for jeans without an elastic waistband! Oh, right, and that fabulous job I was going to brag about? Yeahhhhhh, I’d been laid off the week before.

So much for [reunion] dreams coming true.

Six years later, I’m glad that night didn’t live up to my ridiculous fantasies. Walking into that room, all puffy and slightly embarrassed by who I was – and wasn’t, taught me a lot.

For one, it taught me that the classmate who laughed when I told her my due date wasn’t actually calling me fat and was, in fact, right that I’d be having a baby much sooner than I planned.

But more importantly, it showed me the folly of wishing to be someone other than who I was – and spending precious minutes imagining just how great it would feel to be that woman.

Yesterday I wrote about facing the facts that I’m not really the kind of girl who [fill in the blank]. I don’t look cute in skirts . . . or dust my house, um, ever . . . or make all those cute crafts I file away on Pinterest.

But you know what I do? I throw a great barbecue or baby shower. I make people laugh, a lot – sometimes even on purpose. I make really great dips and desserts – at least once, so I can take pictures and try them out on my friends. And I let my little girl smear my eyeshadow all over my face in her idea of a makeover.

Wishing I could be someone else – or dreaming up scenarios in which I “show ’em all” by being awesome in a way that’s not true or real or ME – is a waste of time and, more importantly, disrespectful of God’s creation.

As in, me and that which I am.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
(Psalm 139:14)

This post is part of Giving Up on Fairy Tales, a 31 Days series. Make sure you don’t miss a post by subscribing to this blog. When you do, you’ll receive an ebook called Finding a Happier Ever After for FREE!

Photo by nkzs and quote from Kabir, Indian philosopher

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